When I am old

I may well wear purple, but I won't have a red hat - I hate wearing hats. But I shall go to my local supermarket and fling a few items into a basket. When I get to the head of the queue at the checkout I'll put my hands to my head and exclaim 'oh my, I've forgotten to get ....'. When that arrives I'll remember something else I've forgotten. When that arrives I'll complain that its the wrong size and wait for them to come back with the 'right size' and then mention that I actually wanted two. I'll drag this game out for as long as I can and then I'll pay my bill with ten pence pieces, slowly counting each one out. Then I'll drop the receipt ... and then pack my shopping, one item at a time - I am old after all. Eventually I shall turn to the extremely long queue behind me and, with a big grin, apologise for keeping them waiting and skip out of the shop.